Negotiating desire and sexual subjectivity: Narratives of young Lesbian Avengers

Abstract

This paper examines the negotiation and interpretation of first experiences of sexual desire in a group of 8 young women who identify as Lesbian Avengers, using in depth narrative interviews. Accounts of desire and its relationship to sexual subjectivity were organised under 4 broad themes: Is this lesbian desire? describes the difficulty in categorising first experiences of desire towards another woman as sexual; My desire makes me a dyke examines desire leading to sudden self-identification as a lesbian; or conversely, to the repression of desire and avoidance of lesbian identity; Lesbian desire is dangerous considers the negative representation of lesbian desire as perverse, sex being seen as central to lesbian identity, and the experience of being subjected to condemnation and abuse; Dealing with dangerous desire looks at the main strategies adopted in response to the above: the positioning of self as outsider, but strong because of it; embracing a transformation of self through becoming lesbian; or remaining in the closet. Key words: Desire; Lesbian; Subjectivity; Sexuality; Narrative.